Thursday, September 16, 2010

It's Been Awhile

Once upon a time, there was a girl who used to blog.

She loved to post cute stories about her kids.

But then she took a break from blogging.

A long break.

So long, that probably no one reads her blog any more.

But now she's thinking she might want to start blogging again.

The end.

Just kidding...that's not really the end.

But it has been a long time since I posted. The last post was in April, so if anyone's counting, I think that's a whopping five months ago. Sheesh!

I guess the only good excuse I can think of it that it's hard to blog when 50% of your children are protected by foster care privacy laws, and you can't blog about them.

Don't get me wrong. Macieo's been up to his usual antics, being all cute and sweet and wonderful. But most of the pictures I have from the last few months include BOTH the boys, and therefore cannot be posted. And having an infant is kind of exhausting. And being a foster mom is the most emotionally draining, frustrating thing in the world. So I guess I've actually had lots of excuses as to why I haven't posted anything here for awhile.

But we've had lots of life changes lately, and for whatever reason, I think my blogging-juices have started flowing again.

Second grade started a few weeks ago. So far it's been stressful. New situations are hard for Macieo, and this one is no exception. New routines. New people. New expectations. We're adjusting. Slowly.

Macieo turned eight. EIGHT!?!?!? When did I become old enough to be the mother of an eight-year-old?

Baby B went back to his biological parents. It's been 8 days since he returned home, and I'm wondering when it's going to start hurting less. 8 days ago, I took my baby to a strange house, handed him to a woman I'm not sure I trust, and walked away. It was the most awful day of my entire life.

I've never liked change. And that's still true about me. But I'm finally starting to grasp that it's kind of inevitable.

And I guess there's an upside to change. God, as always, has shown Himself faithful through a tough couple of months. I have experienced, more than any other time in my life, the awesome power of the prayers of other believers. I have seen my family and friends rally around me and support me in ways that did not expect. There have been people, (often the ones I least expected), who have been willing to come along side us and walk down this road with us in a way that has at times, literally, taken my breath away.

I'm not sure why God chose us for this lifestyle. Sometimes I don't like it. Sometimes I wish we had healthy babies that were born into our family and stayed with us their whole lives, the way "normal" families do. But for whatever reason, God has asked us to walk down this road. And, kicking and screaming, I am walking down it. And I know despite the fact that I don't always love it, God is refining me through it.

All that to say, I'm back. I'm ready to post cute pictures of my kid again. He is quite a charmer, and he did just turn eight (EIGHT!?!?!).

So here's a few shots from his NUMEROUS birthday parties. Enjoy. And stayed tuned :)
His actual birthday fell on Labor Day this year. We had a family party with my side, and he "helped" make the cake. Can you tell??

Grandma, Grandpa, Mom, Dad, Uncle Brandon, Lisa, Macieo and Baby B all spent the day at the Science Center.

We played Pinhead. Can you tell who's who?


Then, the following weekend, there was the friend party. We went bowling at Bass Pro Shop. We had a giant cookie instead of a cake. Fun was had by all!
Macieo received many different toy weapons. Nate assures me this is normal
for a boy his age.

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